THE GOOD, THE BAD AND THE UGLY...taking stock! (PART 2)

Sometimes I wonder if it is strange that my brain works best in the middle of the night, I am the complete definition of the 'human owl'...very nocturnal indeed. Rule number 1- don't be the person to wake me up in the morning, that is quite a punishment both ways I must confess.

Anyway, to the reason I have given myself to stay awake tonight- "taking stock!"...especially after a very eventful day in an extremely eventful year. Yes, it's been a very eventful year; full of twists and turns, thrills, thoughts and thuds. I have sure hit the dust a couple of times this year, but, the beauty of it is that I have gotten up, dusted myself and hit back stronger. I have been my own very George Foreman, coming back tougher and thicker. I can only define the year as 'good, bad and ugly' (in a metaphorical sense).

Looking back, I really cannot say how the year started, can only remember starting the year on vacation with loads of fun and a deep (and fast depleting) pocket. This year is probably the first year I really took time to spell out my targets, aspirations, expectations and plans. I was expectant, truly, and very determined, trusting my own ability and historically 'favoured life' to see me through. Yes, I have been highly lucky (favoured) over the years, getting so much more than I sometimes deserve(d). I was going to be 30, kai, that still sounds strange even after achieving the extra special (age) milestone (man don dey old o...lol).

Thinking back, there is so much joy, yet conflict, in results. I have so much fond memories, but this are diluted by the few challenges and some 'not so good' memories and events. I will be attempting a summary of the memoirs under the aforementioned heading in a very brief sense hoping it say something about life we already know in my own words.

The Good

What can I say, it almost all worked according to script, I was as usual flexing like the king of my world, all pieces falling into place like it was some voodoo at work. I had great plans for the year, spiritually, relationship-wise, financially, career-wise, I had a plan for every area of my life (at least so I thought).

The beauty of planning is that it allows you know where you are and each time you hit a bullseye, there is this feeling of self satisfaction that swells inside you. I met the financial target (at least on a controllable budget basis), surprised myself, got the promotion, moved to Lagos, grew spiritually and defined more and learnt more about myself than I imagined. Yes, i planned and got 'some' reward.

Yes, I missed out on some targets, re-scheduled some CPSs but that does not and cannot stand up to the feeling of satisfaction, the joy in the kill or the history I wrote this year. Finally, I can't help but mention the sweetness in Swtzy during the year, there were mos def some sweet moments.

The Bad

As I mentioned earlier, I thought I had it all figure out...for where!!! Yes, once the devil realises you have a revelation, that you are close to your purpose, he comes at you harder than before. There were ugly patches to the year, believe me. I disappointed myself a couple of times, broke my own heart and that of others too often.

I have habits, as we all do, some pretty bad ones. Not that this habits define me, no, but they do define my failure sometimes. A habit is a habit, good or not, a spade is a spade. We all know our weak points, denying this will be the great act of self denial and/or personal injustice a man (woman) can do himself (herself) at this level (age and time). A habit could be a positive but detrimental one, not knowing when to say no to a favour is a good example (food for thought).

My habits are my weakness (today but not tomorrow), I give a habit(s) up for a while and the go back to it, that is failure, no two ways to define it. That is the bad part of the year for me, my tiny challenges. It could be as little as my choice of words, my sleeping habit, my temperament or even a societal vice such as a puff. Whilst I win/won the final battle, it hurts that I have/had to try twice, not while I think I am my own "King of the Jungle', hmm...

The Ugly

I will simply list this, they are things I hate to remember;

1. Iya Ibadan (RIP) left us for the next life
2. A woman's scorn (wow!!!)
3. Arsenal F.C.
4. Loss of friends (I shed tears still, RIP 'lobo, Udeme, Mrs Sodeinde...)
5. Oceanic!!! (that is a whole story on its own, will share some day)

As I wipe my tears, I can only pray and hope that the 'morrow is greater and better that today. I hold on to God's promise, I hold on to the reason for the festive period, I hold on to Jesus, the author and finisher of my faith (and yours).